OFFICIAL NOTICE OF INTENT TO INSPECT:

Objectives have been decided and declared.
There will be a surprise inspection of the diSSent (Fe) assembly line at the Guelph FACTORY.

Production and reproductions have carried on (masterfully) since our last visit.  

Hugh et al are doing some fine work.  Worthy of their custom projects to be certain, custom projects take time.

I didn’t say slow…no one said slow.

It just FEELS like a long enough time that one might declare it a slow process.
That feeling is merely because time moves more laterally (against the fabric of desire) when you’re excited…patience please.

Today’s visit should confirm what we expect.

What we expect to see are the towering triangles of tyranny, diligently lined up, row after glimmering row.

This will be a sight to behold.
And (in best Yoda voice) be hold yours, soon enough you will.

IN THE WIND AND ON A LAMB:

PRE-MARATHON SNOOZE:  

Near Midland, ON. Canada.

Fledgling superstar racer CRAIG “fuck I’m inadequate” BARLOW has enlisted the softsomemore (University of Phoenix) services of one MATT “ya but it’s like I finished 3rd cause I coulda finished in 3rd if I just finished” SPAK prior to this Sunday’s Mansfield Marathon.

Whilst the two of them giggle uncontrollably under the HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL covers of Spak’s futon (this coming Saturday), we can only assume the advice indoctrined will include such classics as;

• Go out strong, assume the BEST placing possible and then.
  Whatever.  
  After that, no matter what happens, you can’t lose.
• It’s all about the bike.  
  You might need a new sponsor if you…you know…continue to have this kind of umm, season.
• Underestimate everyone.  
  Except for me.  I’m Matt Spak.
• Aren’t I super?  
  Heather says I’m super.  I pay her to say that.  
  Ya, you think about that one for a while…when you’re riding.
  You do think about me don’t you? 

Nations Capital, ON. Canada.

In addition to sharing a lay with a man prone to repeated rectal bleeding, Barlow has vowed to drink Coconut discharge in order to rejuvenate his diluted dogma.  
Seriously?
Whatever voodoo yoodoo need, but Barlow, if you come near me smelling of Malibu rum and ice cream sprinkles – I won’t vouch for your secured safety.

Boltown, ON.  Canada.

Our eventually ending quest to incite a complete physical collapse prior to the BRECK continues.

MTB repeats were staged last night, after dark, in the rain and obviously – up hill both ways.
Sweet sweet failure is imminent.

VICTORY! 

The only undecided that remains prior to the Marathon, what colour should I wear (to match mine eye liner) on the podium?

EQUIVALENCY TEST:

Someyoungguy, CHINA.

This just out, grade 2 children in China are being pre-screened for Dickyitous, a rare webular disease that strikes seemingly intelligent persons with an infernal necessity to tinker and doddle in-perpetuity.

TEST YOUR BAD SELF

Communist law clearly states that failure to complete this task within 2 attempts will result in an immediate expulsion and transfer to the NEXT assembly plant.

That is all.

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